“I used to be an honest person; but now I don’t have to be. It’s just so much easier this way. I’ve gained a lot of productivity by not having to think about doing the ‘right’ thing.”Todd J., Investment Banker
(Protip: April Fools!)
UPDATE: Blogoscoped has all of the Google April Fool’s jokes listed. There are some good ones!
The Google Talk blog reports wants to help lower CO2 emissions and starts reducing the characters you send… by converting them to instant-messenger-speak. For instance, the sentence “As far as I’m concerned, you can give me the twenty dollars you owe me when I see you later.” will be automatically translated to “AFAIC, U can gve me the 20 $$ YOM whn I CUL8R.” before it reaches the other person. You can already see how your texts will translate thanks to the working email@example.com bot.
If you give me $1,626 I will go to the small Okinawan island called Iriomote and send you an envelope filled with star-sand (don’t worry, I’ve been there before, I know where to go). I will send it from there.
If you give me $400 I will take a train to a desolate area with a packed lunch and sit down and read Anna Karenina. I will do this for 6-10 hours. I will repeat the same thing the following days until I have finally read the entire book. Finally! I am only going to do this once, so this is an edition of one only. I will send you documentation of this from the closest mailbox to where I do this. I’ll also write the location of the mailbox on the envelope if you ever wish to go to where I will have sent it to you from.
If you give me $5 i will write down a secret and mail it to you. NOTE: I am not one to keep secrets. If you buy this, you may receive something that is really serious and may be upsetting, so please keep that in mind.
Nick Ripley owns a secret of mine.
If you give me $2,500 I will hire a skywriting jet in Los Angeles in the summer on a sunday to write “I’m Bored” in the sky. I will make a video of it and send you a DVD.
Gmail’s rolled out a lot of good changes lately: IMAP, colored labels (previously only available with Greasemonkey scripts), group chat, AIM chat, permalinks, etc. One great thing I just noticed they snuck in: my storage is now 5.5 GB. Bam!